Last night I was torn between watching Flight of the Navigator and VH1’s 50 Most Awesomely Bad Songs. So I settled for a bit of both.
I watched VH1 long enough to see 10 or 11 songs played and commented on. My favorite comment of the night referred to Butterfly by Crazy Town, and is as follows:
“The first 7000 times you hear this song you think, ‘What a bad song!’ Then the next time you hear it, you realize it’s not a bad song. It’s a [expletive deleted] atrocious song!”
Referring to the same song:
“These have to be, word for word, the worst lyrics ever written.”
My favorite song of the night was Informer by Snow. I had totally forgotten about this song until I heard it last night. I distinctly remember thinking it was cool when I was a kid, and my feelings haven’t changed. Any white boy that has the guts to write a song like this, much less perform it, has my respect. So what if no one understands a freakin’ word he’s saying? It gives me hope for my own songwriting future.
In fact, in Snow’s honor, I’ve penned some incomprehensible lyrics of my own. Read them out loud, and mumble exaggeratedly, like Bob Dylan but more stoned. It’s fun!
— snip snip snip —
callin’ keyboard keyboard monitor mouse me DVD
I go to DVD town eat some waffles on my way eat
a keyboard surfboard boardwalk don’t advance to go
it’s a back you take take you back spaces by the 3 jump
jailbird double roll
jelly doughnut roll slurp up slurpee dateon my tv spaceship ship on the water boat
story of the garbage can puppet in the basement
baseboard snowboard shuffleboard use a fancy stick
good sport sporting goods shoes me head on are butterlovers
soda popsicle juicy sweet a promise lick
short snort pants number sixteen in hole put a monkey cow
— snip snip snip —
I just need a few more verses, a drum solo, a cool foreign accent, and a record label. I can’t wait till someone calls my song [expletive deleted] atrocious.